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How to Photograph a New Puppy - or not in this case!

Posted by Clare Bristow

Following on from a post I made last week in which I gave some tips on how to photograph your dog, I found these 'how to' instructions at Chronwatch-america.com - do they sound familiar?

1. Remove film from box and load camera;
2. Remove film box from puppy's mouth and throw in trash;
3. Remove puppy from trash and brush coffee grounds from muzzle;
4. Choose a suitable background for photo;
5. Mount camera on tripod and focus;
6. Find puppy and take dirty sock from mouth;
7. Place puppy in pre-focused spot and return to camera;
8. Forget about spot and crawl after puppy on knees;
9. Focus with one hand and fend off puppy with other hand;
10. Get tissue and clean nose print from lens;
11. Take flash cube from puppy's mouth and throw in trash;
12. Put cat outside and put peroxide on the scratch on puppy's nose;
13. Put magazines back on coffee table;
14. Try to get puppy's attention by squeaking toy over your head;
15. Replace your glasses and check camera for damage;
16. Jump up in time to grab puppy by scruff of neck and say, "No, outside! No, outside!";
17. Clean up mess;
18. Fix a drink and
19. Sit back in Lazy Boy with drink and resolve to teach puppy "sit" and "stay" the first thing in the morning.

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